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Working Through Old Experiences to Get Your Power Back

Many of us carry unresolved past experiences around with us that affect how we live, our perception of things, the decisions we make and the way we react to others. It’s often referred to as baggage. But it’s not just baggage. These unresolved past experiences can truly affect us so deeply. Keeping us upset for far too long, creating distraction from simple everyday activities and of course affecting mood, motivation, trust in others, confidence and the list goes on and on.

Are there situations in your life that you still haven’t digested? Do you carry guilt from your past and know, deep down, it affects how you think, feel, and act?

Have you been upset about a situation for days, months, or even years and wish you could just move on?

Did you know that guilt, shame, embarrassment and resentment are some of the most toxic emotions affecting you in your everyday actions?! No wonder your thoughts are getting consumed by them.

Did you know that if you don’t resolve these past experiences, and instead ignore them or sweep them under the rug, they will come back and bite you in the a**?!

These unresolved conflicts come back as repeated patterns until you learn to deal with it! For the longest time my repeated pattern (as a people-pleaser) was being afraid to speak my mind in fear of rejection and judgment from others. Do you know how many times I would sit there quietly and say nothing?! I would then find myself in situations I really didn’t want to be in… leaving me feeling jaded and resentful towards life and others. This was NOT healthy for me or my relationships! I knew I needed change. I needed to be able to stand up for myself and speak my mind WITHOUT fearing the reaction from others. I needed to resolve my baggage (unhealthy patterns created by unresolved conflict) so I could be a better version of myself, for me and my family.

There are many amazing philosophies out there that can help you have a healthy mindset, have greater happiness, and feel more empowered. However, I must say this next philosophy that I learned from studying with Dr. John Demartini, Human Behaviour Specialist, is a life changer. Empowering you to dissolve most, if not all, past or current emotional views you have on negative situations in your life.

Here is a simple and powerful technique to help you shift your mindset!

Look for the hidden blessings behind your situations.

Ask yourself how you or the people around you benefit from the situation you are in and write them down! The trick to this amazing strategy is to exhaust your list of benefits/hidden blessings until you can see that there are as many benefits as drawbacks in your situation.

Give it a try! Start by identifying a situation that still bothers you and ask yourself questions that will shift your perspective until you no longer feel upset about it.

Here are some questions that will help you shift your perspective.

  1. What are the benefits to me and others from me being in this situation?

  2. What opportunities exist here for me?

  3. What am I learning about myself?

  4. What could I possibly be missing if this situation was not to occur?

  5. What do I need to pay attention to now that this is happening?

  6. What is this challenge helping me to realize?

  7. What do I need to focus on?

The power we have by simply shifting our perspective actually changes the way we experience and live our life. When overly emotional about a situation we lose sight of the opposite perspective leaving us feeling angry, inadequate and powerless. Shifting our perspective, however, gives us new solutions, greater energy, confidence, greater self-esteem, the freedom to enjoy more out of life, a healthier body and mindset and so much more!

So let’s stop avoiding the baggage from the past and set ourselves free from toxic emotions like resentment and guilt by learning from these experiences instead and also by finding the benefits behind these situations. It will change your life forever.


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